At this very moment I'm writing, I am here in Butuan, alone. This is "officially" my second solo trip, my first locally. Why do I do it? On the surface, I simply want to wander and escape Manila. I want out of my "everydayness". On a much in-depth note, I want to know my capabilities, of my strengths, and to abate my weaknesses. I want to discover more of me. Apparently my nearing three decades of lifetime seems foreign to myself. And I thought I already know "Merie". No, there is so much beyond her unearthed. She has attached herself to a lot of things, and as soon as they're gone a piece of her went with them.
I want to have an attachment to myself. That nothing can tear my identity apart. NOTHING.
It may sound selfish, but I guess I have been selfless enough -- in both positive and negative of ways.
And an attachment to the Someone within me. That my focus may be retuned to him. Nothing else above. I want to hear him loud and clear. I want him to direct my path. I want his signs and miracles. Because my identity is in him.
And I will keep traveling solo, until I visit all 81 provinces and until I set my feet on all continents. Until myself is no longer sufficient to discover myself. Until there is nothing left to discover.