This is overdue but I MUST BLOG ABOUT THIS! Part of the greatest things I’m thankful for this 2013 is being one of the grand winners of Ensembles’ Wear My Design Year 2! Thus, it is apt to write a sole post for this very ultimate superb memorable event in my life!
As what my family and most of my friends know about me, there’s something about fashion that I just really love. One of my greatest dreams is to be in the fashion industry, a fashion designer in particular. It’s a frustration I can’t simply forego! Haha! But I lack in any drive and source to pursue it. So for most of the days of my way of life, I let it sit somewhere I could just pick it up WHENEVER I feel like it. Gets? Parang wala lang that I declared to myself it’s not a passion at all. I allowed opportunities pass me by, hi hello goodbye. I didn’t study when I’ve had those plenty of time. Despite all those encouragements and moral support, nada, I just left it there sitting…
… Until last year (2012) happened; until a friend urged me and together with another one gave all sorts of support I needed! It was an overwhelming feeling and alas I felt like I was in a position to pick it up where I left it, take hold of it and give it a shot. That’s when I joined Ensembles’ first year Wear My Design contest. To cut the drama, I failed. But it paved way to start a mini business; to pursue it even through tiny steps; and to join again this year.
The moment I saw that the contest is running on its second year, I decided immediately that I will join. I even told RV, the friend who urged me to join, that I will join again and “itaga mo sa bato mananalo ako this year”. It’s funny how looking back from this point how strong the statement was – more of a declaration. The process this year compared to last year was quicker. I sketched first day, looked for and bought the fabrics/materials and sent the designs to the dressmaker the next day. Claimed and submitted my two entries on the fifth day – which was also the last day of submission. Yup, last-minute crammer! Haha! Work got in the way on the early days of the contest.
And then I prayed. I kept on praying and claiming it according to His will. I told Him that I’ll take whatever the result will be a sign. I told Him that despite whatever my heart and thinking desire let His will still be done. I just kept on praying and writing on my prayer journal about this contest. Yung tipong “Pero Lord, mas masaya kung mananalo ako pero Kayo pa rin bahala!” Hahaha!
A month has gone and they posted one by one the top 20 entries. When I saw the 18th entry posted, I let it go and stopped expecting that my entry would make it to the final two spots. I already prayed and said thank You Lord, and I’m taking this as a sign. Syempre, nagdrama na ako kay Luke, “Luke I failed, di ulit ako nanalo. ‘Di siguro talaga para sakin. Pangit ng gawa ko, ang gaganda ng kanila… not for me not for me etc!” and though he told me “For me the best yung gawa mo.” Syempre nagself-pity pa rin ako “hindi rin ‘di sana nakapasok yung dresses ko bla bla bla.” As in non-sense drama. :P
And then it was a Thursday, I was with Luke, this is funny, and as I’m browsing through my Facebook feed like a normal day, I saw my Mom shared a photo of my entry from Ensembles’ page. At first I thought “Mama, voting’s over so no use sharing it” but I have to read it to fully comprehend that my black and white dress which I labelled “Bloom” made it to Top 20!!! Top 20 pa lang yun pero I felt like I WON ALREADY!! I was so happy and of course I told Luke, syempre gusto nya ko konyatan “ang drama drama mo pa di pala kasama sa Top 20 ah…” Hahaha! Drama nga naman! Super saya!!! In all honesty, still, right at that point in time, DI NA KO NAG-EXPECT and already prayed to God THANK YOU! This is already a win! But my Father knows better than I do and has the greatest plans for me!
It was Sunday, I was again with Luke and I saw that Ensembles twat that they were announcing the eight grand winners of the contest. Though I didn’t expect, there was a tiny spark of hope that when I click on the Instagram link from their tweet I would see my design, but more of I’m interested to know what entries made it grand. Pa-suspense pa yung data plan ko that time, nagmamabagal!! And then... the first entry in the photo was mine!!!!!!! I was like IS THIS REALLY FOR REAL??!!! SURREAL FEELING!! I literally shook Luke to my excitement and joy! I was almost in tears! If only we are not in a public place I’d have cried! It was one of the best feelings ever!!! I won the contest! God gave me that sign. Right then and there, I once again have proven God’s sovereignty. Indeed, He doesn’t just put desires in our hearts, He has plans! We just have to work it out and put our trust in Him, and pray pray pray and ask for the guidance of the Holy Spirit.
This is so far the highlight of my 2013. God knows I needed this. It helped me a lot in different facets of my life. I have been “working“ a lot on my self-worth, self-acceptance, self-confidence, talents, skills, getting rid of insecurities, self-pity and worthless negativity-- and it isn’t easy, and this was a grand boost! Lord!! Ang galing galing Niyo!! Nothing that God can not answer.
With this win, God has been really gracious, nothing but praises and I’m lifting this up to Him. My heart is overflowing with gratitude! Lord, thank You, thank You so much!!!